


Busted

by Lisamc21



Category: Schitt's Creek
Genre: Blow Jobs, First Kiss, First Time, Hand Jobs, M/M, Masturbation, Patrick Brewer is Gay, Patrick Brewer is Thirsty, Patrick Brewer is an Ass Man, Pre-Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-10
Updated: 2020-11-10
Packaged: 2021-03-08 17:53:50
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,159
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27480775
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lisamc21/pseuds/Lisamc21
Summary: David Rose in those skirted pants, amirite? Patrick hit his limit when David bent over in them and had to take matters into his own hands. In the Rose Apothecary employee bathroom during business hours. Naughty, Patrick.
Relationships: Patrick Brewer/David Rose
Comments: 38
Kudos: 259
Collections: Politics? What Politics?





	Busted

**Author's Note:**

> Joining in the U.S. election celebration by doing a quick write of some sexy times with our favorite guys. I can't think of a better way to celebrate than (smuttily) honoring a show that depicts a world filled with love and without homophobia. A world I feel like we may be a tiny step closer to this week. <3

Patrick pressed his fingernails into his palms as hard as he could, but the discomfort did nothing to reign in the desire coursing through him. He was desperate for any semblance of control. Button-up Patrick Brewer never lost control. Always a level head and an even demeanor.

Except in the presence of David Rose.

Except when David wore those slim-fit skirted pants.

Especially when he _bent over_ in said skirted pants to pick up the lip balms that went flying off the counter and toward the front door when David had a particularly animated reaction to Patrick’s insistence that a baseball game was a perfectly fine date setting.

Hypothetically, of course, since they weren’t dating. No, they flirted non-stop, made innuendos, sent lingering glances, and in Patrick’s case, masturbated all the goddamn time.

He usually managed to wait until he got back to his room at Ray’s, but David and those skirted pants conspired against him. Normally, David bent at the knees if he had to pick something up. Patrick knew that because he was always aware of David’s movement in the store.

But at the waist? Seriously?! How the hell was Patrick supposed to hold out for the next three hours and twenty-seven minutes until they closed. He’d run over to the cafe and take care of himself in their bathroom, but passing by the townies with a boner probably wasn’t the best contribution to the Rose Apothecary brand.

_Those pants_. The snug fit through David’s lean and surprisingly defined legs. David had amazing legs. But that wasn’t what had Patrick’s jeans fitting like a vice. It was his ass. David Rose had the ass of a god. The material hugged the curve of it perfectly leaving Patrick wanting to bite it. Lick it. Rub his hands all over it. That’s what had him hard as steel. But what had him turning and rushing to the employee bathroom was the defined indent of material between his cheeks. The crease that featured in Patrick’s dirtiest fantasies of David.

He’d barely closed the bathroom door when his shaking fingers fumbled with his button and zipper. He leaned against the wall opposite the sink as he pushed his pants and boxers low enough to free his cock. He squeezed and exhaled. Fuck. So hard. With a wet lick to his palm, he stroked himself fast and furious, just shy of too much. He imagined rubbing his cock up and down David’s crease, pressing against his hole until David begged him for more. Using his fingers and tongue to open David up for him so he could fuck him like he deserved. Fuck him until he sobbed Patrick’s name.

Using his free hand, he squeezed his balls. He breathed in and out of his nose to keep the noise down. Dammit, he should’ve turned the tap on or something. Oh well. Not like it was going to take very long, and David was probably still bending over and picking up lip balms.

Patrick leaned his head back against the wall as he picked up the pace. Thinking of David’s long fingers wrapped around his cock as David licked his neck. Patrick moaned as the door swung open.

“Fuck!”

“Fuck!” Patrick froze and stared at David.

David’s attention shot down to Patrick’s hands. “Sorry! Fuck!” After a beat, he closed the door.

Patrick’s heart thundered to a level that should probably have him calling emergency services. Oh God. Oh fuck. Fuck fuck fuck. He forgot to lock the door. Fuck! Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck.

“Um, Patrick?”

“Not here. Dead from embarrassment.” Patrick willed his heart rate to slow down.

“Can I ask you a question?”

Seriously? “Can you ask me later? It’s not a good time.”

“Please?”

Of course he’d do anything David asked if he put _please_ with it. “Fine.”

“Uh, what got you worked up so you rushed off to the bathroom?” David sounded so unusually hesitant. Hopeful? “Which, sorry by the way, I thought you were in the storeroom.”

Patrick looked at the closed door. He could lie and say he was on some medication that gave him random boners and the doctor said to deal with them when they came. Or that he needed some stress relief.

Or.

_Or_.

Or he could factor in all of their flirting and innuendo and that maybe, _maybe_ David had _intentionally_ bent over at the waist and come to the conclusion it was time to shoot his shot.

He ran his hand through his hair. “You bent over and your ass looks amazing in those pants. Skirt. Pants. Things.” He dropped his head and waited for David’s excuses that he had some fake appointment to get to or needed to help his family with their latest drama. The awkwardness ahead of them would be unbearable.

David made a strangled sound. “You thought my ass looked good so you ran in here to rub one out?” His voice was high-pitched, almost shrill.

“Uh, yes? Have you seen your ass?”

“And you couldn’t wait until you got back to Ray’s?”

“No! I usually can but I couldn’t today. I’m sorry!” Patrick didn’t care that he yelled. He was embarrassed and annoyed and still a little turned on.

“ _Usually_ can?” Several seconds went by with neither saying anything. What was there to say? “Wait there. Give me thirty seconds,” David said in a strangely even voice.

Patrick’s head shot up. He tucked his deflated dick back in his pants and zipped up. His mind raced but he couldn’t come up with a single coherent thought.

“Patrick, please come out of the bathroom.”

He stared at the door. How the hell could he face David? What was he supposed to say? _Sorry, David. I crossed a major professional boundary here. I understand if you want me to leave and never come back. But you really do have an amazing ass. So, um, congratulations on that?_

“I can’t.” Embarrassed, annoyed, turned on, and petulant. Great.

“It’s okay. I promise. Trust me?” The doorknob turned, but David didn’t push it open. “Please, Patrick.”

Please, Patrick.

Two words.

Those two words he’d imagined hearing in a thousand ways. In a hundred configurations of their bodies pleasuring each other.

He trusted David.

Patrick slowly pulled the door open. David stood there with his eyes focused and pupils dilated so they almost looked black. He grabbed Patrick by the wrist and pulled him away from the bathroom, pushing him up against a nearby wall.

“Unnff.” Holy fuck. _Holy fuck_. That was the hottest thing ever. In all time. David was so much stronger than Patrick realized. Jesus.

“Patrick.” David’s pupils grew as he crowded into his space. He slid a hand up his neck to the back of his head, his long fingers palming him like a basketball. He left his shame in the bathroom, so he leaned into the touch. “Fuck. You’re so hot.”

Patrick’s eyes widened. David thought he was hot? David licked his lips, and Patrick followed the movement. He leaned in a fraction and David was on him. There was nothing chaste or gentle about that kiss. David kissed him like he was a starved man. Patrick kissed back like David was the only drop of water in a desert.

David pulled back. “Sorry, but I refuse to let our first kiss be in a bathroom. Even our bathroom.”

Patrick laughed, nearly giggled. _Our bathroom_. “But up against a refurbished hutch hiding toilet plungers tucked in the back room of our store is fine?”

“Obviously.” One side of David’s mouth turned up into Patrick’s favorite grin, but that grin packed a hell of a bigger punch when David’s lips were swollen from kissing.

“But we’re still open.” Patrick’s breathing came hard.

David arched an eyebrow. “I may have put the ‘back in 15 minutes’ sign up and locked the door.” He tucked his fingers into the waistband of Patrick’s jeans on each side of the button. “Can I? I know you don’t like to leave projects unfinished.”

Patrick looked down at his hands. The hands he’d imagined touching him everywhere. “Are you sure? Here? Now?”

David crowded further into his space and slid his stubbled cheek along Patrick’s. He groaned at the unfamiliar sensation. “Yes, here. Now. I just accidentally walked in on the guy I’ve wanted for a long fucking time jerking off because he saw me bend over. Yeah, I’m sure, Patrick.”

“A long fucking time, huh?” Patrick smiled as David nipped his ear.

“You had me at, _Hi, I’m Patrick_.”

Patrick’s eyes widened and he grabbed the sides of David’s face. “That long?”

David bit his lips together and nodded.

“David, me too.” He pulled David in for a bruising kiss. “Me too,” he said against his lips, his tongue exploring David’s.

David’s fingers expertly undid his fly, and before Patrick could react to the cold air, David’s warm hand was on him. Stroking, teasing, touching. Patrick should have been embarrassed by the sounds coming out of his mouth and going into David’s, but he couldn’t muster the strength to care about anything but the feeling of David’s skin on his. The right amount of pressure. Thumb stroking over the head.

He ran his hands up David’s arms, feeling the flex of his bicep as he stroked Patrick. “I’ve thought about you touching me so many times.”

David licked Patrick’s neck, and he nearly came. “Yeah? What else have you thought about?”

Patrick let out a sharp laugh. “What _haven’t_ I thought about? Touching you like this. Sucking you off. Touching your ass. Licking you. Fucking you. Making you come until you see stars.”

He’d never been a dirty talker before, but then again, he’d never had David Rose touching his cock before.  
David moaned as he kissed along Patrick’s jaw line. “All of that sounds so good, Patrick. So good. What else?”  
He tried to think but David’s hands and mouth were distracting as hell. “I’ve thought about taking you to dinner. Sitting on the same side of the table and running my hands over your lap slowly. Enough to get you hard, wanting, close but not quite there. Making you wait through dinner.”

“God, yes.” He breathed hard in Patrick’s ear. “Dinner? Like a date?”

“Yes. I want to take you on a thousand dates.” Left his filter in the bathroom too.

David pulled back far enough to look in Patrick’s eyes. The heat and lust were still there, but Patrick saw more. Something soft and fond. Happy. “You do?”

“My feelings for you go way deeper than getting each other off. Though I’m also very interested in that.”

The slow smile that took over David’s face in that moment would be burned in Patrick’s memory forever. So would the way David dropped to his knees and licked the precum off Patrick’s cock.

He barely had time to suck in a breath before David swallowed him to the hilt, rubbing his tongue on the underside of his dick. The heady combination of heat, suction, and David’s tongue ripped a groan from Patrick’s throat. David was relentless in his immediate mastery of Patrick’s cock. He alternated between taking him deep, teasing the head, licking the shaft, and touching his balls in a way that kept Patrick dizzy and hurtling toward the best orgasm of his life.

His muscles tightened as the tension moved through his abdomen. “I’m gonna come.” David responded by moaning with Patrick’s cock down his throat. The vibrations pushed him over the edge and his entire body tensed as the orgasm slammed into him like a freight train. All he could do was hold onto David’s shoulders as he licked Patrick clean. He squeezed his eyes closed so hard that white dots clouded his vision. “Fucking Christ, David. You’re like a cock magician.”

David’s shoulders shook with laughter. Patrick tried to be embarrassed but he had no energy left. “Is this the type of post-orgasm wit I can look forward to?”

“I mean, there are worse compliments.”

“No, I know. I might add it to my business card. David Rose. Chief aesthetics officer and cock magician at Rose Apothecary.”

“Shut up,” Patrick said, laughing. Feeling lighter and happier than ever before.

David wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. He’s so damn beautiful.

“Your turn.” Patrick licked his lips as he looked down at David on his knees in front of him. The endless times he’d pictured it were nothing compared to the real thing.

“We should get back to work. I think it’s been 15 minutes.” David’s smirk nearly had him hard again. “Take me on a date tonight and you can have my cock for dessert,” David purred. “Just not to a baseball game because that’s incorrect.”

Patrick pulled the phone from his back pocket and had a reservation at David’s favorite (only) Elmdale Thai restaurant before David had tucked Patrick’s softening dick back in his pants and stood up.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! I'm over on Tumblr at [lisamc-21](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/lisamc-21).


End file.
